Stir fry with a friend

Four years ago when I started volunteering at JOIN, I met many interesting people at the day center, aka "the house". Some people I saw once or twice and some I saw everyday. Many of the regulars I got to know well, and when I left for college I stayed in touch with many of them. In the past when I only worked in the day center, when someone transitioned into housing I generally did not see them very often afterward, if at all. Now I spend the majority of my time visiting folks and helping out the retention team. It is wonderful getting to see people who I've known for several years transition from outside to inside in housing. Instead of seeing them at the day center, I get to sit on their couch and chat with them in their own place.

I have the opportunity and pleasure to visit one of the people who I have known for awhile but had lost contact with. One of the retention workers mentioned that this guy could benefit from some more visiting. I didn't recognize his last name so I thought it was someone I hadn't met yet, but when he came into JOIN and Steve introduced us, I recognized him immediately and was so glad to see him again after having not seen him for a long time. Shortly thereafter I started visiting him at his home weekly. I often spend about an hour and half to two hours hanging around and chatting with him, sometimes going on walks in his neighborhood or grabbing coffee nearby. I love visiting him, he is such a kind hearted good soul, it never feels like work when I visit him.
He is currently struggling with depression and the past few weeks were really hard on him, so I wanted to do something special with him to cheer him up a bit. After finding out he likes stir frys, we set a date to cook stir fry for dinner together. So yesterday my boyfriend (whom he had mentioned he wanted to meet) and I headed over to his place with our share of the ingredients. Within five minutes he and my boyfriend were chatting it up and getting along wonderfully. As I was slicing the peppers while watching them talk, I jut had to smile to myself. It was so wonderful to see him sitting in his own home rather than outside and at the JOIN day center. It makes me so happy to know I have been able to create such a strong relationship with this guy and to know that he trusts me as much as he does. Because of JOIN's encouragement and support I have been able to build this close relationship with him.

Volunteer of the Month: Debbie Stewart

Beth was homeless for over 4 years when she decided to get clean and find housing. Through her methadone program, Beth and her partner were able to find a subsidized apartment. Beth and Ed had a long-term relationship with one of JOIN's Outreach Workers, and when they were ready to move inside, JOIN helped pay the deposit and other move-in fees. After an 8 year battle, Beth's SSI claim was finally approved last April, giving her a monthly income and allowing her to be financially self-sufficient.

Steve, Beth's Retention Worker at JOIN, encouraged Beth to get involved with some of the community-building activities and events that JOIN offers. Beth came to Sunset Presbyterian's monthly dinner where she met Debbie, a member of the church who was interested in volunteering with JOIN. Steve asked Debbie if she would be interested in becoming a "friendly visitor," visiting Beth in her home and supporting her transition to stability. Debbie and Beth both agreed to meet.

Debbie realized that she and Beth were going to hit it off, despite their different backgrounds, on one of their first visits: "We seem to enjoy a similar quirky sense of humor. I think I knew this first when she was telling me about her habit of chewing ice. She was telling me once about going through a couple of 5 pound bags of ice every couple of days. I said very seriously, 'You know that chewing ice is really bad for your teeth?' She looks at me with her nearly toothless grin and says, 'I'll remember that!' And we both cracked up. It was a moment that for some people might have been awkward for one or both of us but instead we both saw the ridiculousness of it."

Soon after Debbie started visiting Beth, Beth's partner Ed passed away. Debbie was one of the first people Beth called when she found Ed in their apartment. Debbie was and continues to be "grateful for Beth's trust in me and being willing to share something so personal." The two women soon grew close and for almost a year now spend every Tuesday together. This kind of friendship is new for Beth, she says, "I've never really had anybody in my life besides my significant other. I learned that I need other people too." Beth received a large back payment from social security when her claim was approved, and was intimidated by having to manage money for the first time in her life. Debbie is helping Beth learn to budget, advising her on when it's appropriate to "splurge" and when she should spend wisely.

Beth and Debbie start every Tuesday morning at the coffee shop near Beth's apartment, and decide what the day will hold. They do a variety of things including visits to the Rose Garden, manicures, and shopping. Beth says that Debbie is a great listener--"I can talk to her and open up to her. She hangs on to every word I say and really listens. If there's something I don't know I can ask her and she will get on the internet and look it up!" Both women express how grateful they are for the friendship, and how much they both have learned from each other. Beth said, "I would never give her up, she is worth millions."

Thank you Debbie for your dedication to Beth and JOIN. People like you help make it possible for formerly homeless individuals to permanently break the cycle of homelessness and find strong, vibrant, and supportive communities.

Haircutting Day at JOIN!

Ginger and Amanda, two stylists from Regis Salon, generously donated their day off to provide haircuts for friends at JOIN. They were here for 5 hours and did almost 30 cuts! Ginger and Amanda plan to organize their friends and co-workers to provide a day of haircuts each month at JOIN. Thank you so much! To view more photos from the day, became our fan on facebook and view the album. Just click here.

saying goodbye to JOIN in the language of cards.

By Malcolm White, Immersion Coordinator



My last day at JOIN was on Friday. As a Jesuit Volunteer, I am only on contract for one calendar year, so August approached like the witching hour in my last weeks at JOIN. I buried the idea of leaving for a while under the frantic list of overdue tasks following the Portland Plunge, my biggest event of the year in late June. Yet, no matter how I resisted, the days of July melted away in the 100+ degree heat until only one remained, and I reluctantly told folks that if these silly goodbyes were to happen, now would have to be the time.

The day dawned with anticipation and chaos for me; quite typical of any JOIN landscape. Like a graduation of sorts, I felt the pressure to set up food and festivities for visitors to come in order to meet my final high expectations. In the end, nothing quite worked that way and yet it was perfect all the same....

JOIN can seem like a foreign land with its own language upon first visit. The chaos of the House seems unintelligible, and for the brand new employee watching his brilliant co-workers easily swim through the currents of confusion, one had to wonder "can I do this?" So on that stupified first day long ago, I finally recognized some familiar lingo coming from the cribbage table corner. I'd been playing the card game for 15 years, so while I'd maybe struggled interacting with people earlier that day, I felt welcome in an enironment where diamonds and clubs were the language of the day rather than social work dialects. I met Jake, the self-proclaimed "Captain Crib" that day, along with a few others, and friendships were formed around the knowledge that even if I had no clue about how to write you a laundry voucher, I would be able to at least lose (and occasionally win) at cribbage with you....

...Fast forward back to July 31. The afternoon of my final day was waning, and Jake and the other usual players hounded me about getting in my last games with them. By this point I was adroit at writing laundry vouchers and felt like I could carry that same swagger at the card table. After Jake thrashed my predecessor, I sat down in front of this 350 pound man and said "I'm not that easy to beat."

I have never quite been so incorrect. Josh easily dispatched me in a quick game and then, being a generous soul, gave up his spot in the winner's seat to allow me my final games with other rivals. One after one they came, one after one they left victorious. When the smoke cleared, I had lost 4 straight in a card game whose language I spoke fluently. Oddly enough though, it was a reverse situation to my earliest days: while I apparently could not play a good hand of cards to save me from drowning, I laughed and joked with each of my opponents easily throughout the fiasco. I finally stood up from the table not upset at my humble 0-4 record, but rather grateful to have known and spent the year with Jake and each of the smiling gentlemen who had so capably administered my losses.

As the door finally closed and I gave my last hug and told my last inside joke, I relaized I spoke the language of JOIN with ease. But as with any language, steady practice is the only thing that keeps one adept, so as I venture back to the East Coast I know that I will slowly lose the fluency I so happily earned through countless hours of cribbage and chaos. And I will miss it. I think that one day in the future, when I finally do manage to beat my next opponent in cribbage, I'll look back and only wish that I could lose 4 straight again...

Chronic Funny Business Syndrome

by Bill Boyd

My friend Don passed away in his home a few months back, 2 weeks shy of his 60th birthday.

Don was one of the most colorful people I had met at JOIN. I met Don in inner southeast Portland in late 2004, and it took the better part of 6 months before he trusted my intent on offering him a way off the streets. He was successful in finding a studio apartment in mid 2005.

On the exterior, Don was a tough person to be with - he was usually drinking, often angry and always quick with a complaint. But as time and mutual persistence played its role, his true nature began to emerge. He had a sharp wit, a passion about science and technology, and a love of late night talk radio. Plus, he was an inspired harmonica player, and would share many of the old time classics, as well as some original tunes.

Don had a tough upbringing, and he developed many methods to protect himself. His efforts to hide his vulnerability often resulted in isolation. But during his 3+ years in housing, we became true friends. Granted, I had to be his social worker on occasion to help keep his housing intact, but he'd rather tell me the latest jokes than discuss ways to keep his landlord happy. He always summarized his willingness to abide by the rules: "I'll do anything within reason. My reason."

He loved to self-diagnose his condition, which he labeled CFBS - Chronic Funny Business Syndrome (with an emphasis on the BS). Some of the symptoms of CFBS included an insessent fascination with the trivial, endless tinkering with dead electronic equipment, ruminating over an embellishment of his last joke, and an idolization of both Alfred E Newman and Albert Einstein.

Time went on, and his love of wine and disdain of compliance with mainstream norms of cleanliness began to take their toll. His landlord began issuing the "clean up or pack up" ultimatums, which Don ignored. I knew his time in housing was coming to an end.

After two days of knocking on his door with no response, I pushed it open. He must have been on his floor for a few days. I couldn't get myself to look at his face - death is not something I handle well. The police were the first to arrive. I know their job probably demands the development of a grim sense of humor, but I found their disparaging comments about Don and his situation both insensitive and dehumanizing. I kept quiet. The medical examiner was more compassionate about the situation. He said that it was unlikely that an autopsy would be done, since there was no foul play. Since Don didn't have any extended family, his passing would go unnoticed by society... no death announcement, no burial stone, no recognition of his time with us in this life.

I guess this blog will have to suffice. I think of Don often.

JOIN's Future Home

We are slowly crafting a shared vision and plan for JOIN's future home at 1435 NE 81st Ave. The design so far has been sculpted from the suggestions and ideas of JOIN's Board of Directors, Staff, and most importantly the people JOIN serves. The ideas are functional in nature in our effort to deliver services. However, like everything that JOIN does, there is a strong set of values behind them with the goal of incorporating practical and sustainability principles. Our architects Doug Circosta and Saj Jivanjee have done a masterful job in hearing and articulating these ideas through drawings. We appreciate their patiences with us.

The implementation of those ideas has begun with some of the same people that created them through dismantling the inside of the building. As one of JOIN's partners said to me, 'This isn't demolition, it's deconstruction.' He was correct. Our demo process is really a deconstruction process. We are recycling or reusing the majority of materials that are coming out of the building. The vast majority of the work is being done by volunteers--105 volunteers' hours so far. We have had employees from Tazo Tea, members from Sunset Presbyterian Church, the JOIN staff, and several of the people JOIN serves.

We have reclaimed roughly:

17 sheets of sheetrock
16 sheets of plywood
280 feet of insulation
11 doors
2 windows
56 metal studs
27 wood studs
47 feet conduit
several pounds of screws

We are recycling the metal and old sheetrock that cannot be used. All the work being done is under the watchful eye of Stewart March, our general contractor. Stewart brings his own experience and passion for sustainable creations. We will keep you updated on our progress as the summer unfolds.

I love the Greeks!

by Annie Jesperson, Retention Worker

For my first blog entry ever how could I not write about one of my favorite topics of all time: the GREEKS (the Holy Trinity Greek Orthodox Church community)!! A group of about 15 people from Holy Trinity started a Greek cooking class for folks JOIN has helped into housing, as a way to promote health and build community. They initially organized a series of six cooking classes for 12 newly housed individuals, during which Greek restaurant owners would provide the food for hands-on cooking demonstrations. After each class, the participants and the parishioners ate the meal they taught us to cook and sent folks away with supplies to make the meal again at home. It was an incredible time for everyone involved (as demonstrated by almost perfect attendance for all the classes, which is unheard of for the majority of JOIN events, as people's lives are super unpredictable).

It all sounds a bit wild, doesn't it? Folks who had recently moved off the streets teaming up weekly with Greek Orthodox parishioners for Greek cooking and friendship? It was wild brilliance. Pure beautiful brilliance.

Nobody was willing to say goodbye to the relationships that were formed in those six weeks. After that first round of classes, the parishioners hosted four reunion dinners (including a special Christmas party at a Greek restaurant's banquet hall), some of them shared Christmas day with the JOIN folks who didn't have family to be with for the holidays, three of the women from Trinity attended a JOIN woman's child's birthday party, and continue to regularly support her, they provided the whole JOIN crew with free tickets to the hugely popular 3 day Greek festival, and, and, and...there's way too much generosity to report in one blog!

The Greeks have now completed their second six-week set of classes to which they invited ALL the JOIN folks who participated in the first round (AND THEY ALL TOOK THE CLASSES AGAIN)!! They also added slots to the class to bring five new fortunate people into the joy-filled fold. The Holy Trinity group is already planning round three for the fall of 2009, during which they plan on helping participants gain their food handlers card and other special cooking related certifications to help folks in their pursuit to find work. In a recent cooking class feedback meeting, Darius said what he liked most about the class were the people. Mik appreciated how the parishioners treated him like a human being. Theo, a JOIN participant, echoed these sentiments and said he most valued the fellowship that was a part of every night of this experience. Oh, how I love THE GREEKS!